To All Women Who Wear Makeup,
I Salute You! I do not know how you all do it. More power to you all!
OH MY GOODNESS.
It has come to my attention recently that I might possibly want to consider wearing some makeup. Now I have not worn any makeup since... well..... ever. And I am 52. I mean I think I wore some in High School...but was called "Bozo" way too often, so I don't think I wore it long. I obviously didn't know how or the other kids in my school were absolutely horrendous. Which now that I remember, I think they were as I was chased by several girls each day I went simply because I wore a Bra to school. (mom always said you should wear a bra to school)
Geez, I don't know why I'm not in some kind of therapy. :(
I didn't have anyone to "show" me how to wear makeup, except for when I went to Bible College in Florida and a few times they had a lady come in to demonstrate the correct way to wear makeup. It was shortly after that when I burnt my face and the doctor told me it was better not to wear any makeup especially foundation or any type of liquid and if I wore any I should use Cover Girl only. So that's all I use.
Then I remember asking my dad for some kind of allowance to go buy some makeup to wear, as I saw him dish out cash constantly for my older sister who wore makeup like it was going out of style and didn't use the cheap stuff either, she shopped for her makeup at a place called Merle Norman's..and back then it was one of the more expensive places to purchase makeup products.
But back to ME.....
when I asked dad for some money for myself, he said no I didn't need any, I was naturally pretty and didn't need makeup like my sister. Well it hurt some not to get any money, but then of course I got a thick head for a while and was sure my sister had to look like Cruella DeVil without makeup. But then got older and realized how cheap my dad can be and what he was really doing was saving money by not having to give me any for makeup. Because I remember having the same conversation with him over buying school clothes. He told me I could go to Kresge's, as their clothes were exactly the same as the higher priced stores, it just made a difference to how you took care of them all the while giving my sister an open charge account to Paul Harris.
Man, I really cannot believe I am not in therapy.
Ok that took way too much outta me.
Anyhow, as I said since it came to my attention that I needed to consider wearing makeup, I just have not got it out of my mind. (Some people are just mean) So I decided to go try something different. The only thing I do is a bit of blush. So, First off I got some lipstick/gloss or whatever it's called. I saw a commercial and decided it was for me as it was to make your lips plumper and shiny, and my 13 year old niece wears it why shouldn't I, besides I had a coupon.
Holy Crap, how does anybody actually wear this stuff? I mean I didn't just try it once I tried it twice. And the second time I could not wipe it off my lips fast enough...it stung the crap outta my lips. I used creams, Vaseline, soap and water but nothing helped for what seemed like an hour. I had to sit with my lips down in a glass full of ice and Mountain Dew for about 20 minutes. It wore me out.
Ok a few weeks went by and I thought I was over it, then I got another coupon and bright idea. I got some mascara. I tried it one day while I was home alone, it didn't take too long til I took it off, about 5 seconds as soon as I could pry my eyes open. My eyes felt like I had mud on them. I decided to give it another try and I could only think of one thing to say after seeing myself, so I went to Shankie and placed my hand over my forehead and said...
"I am ready for my closeup Mr. DeMille!!"
You know from the movie Sunset Boulevard with Gloria Swanson as Norma Desmond?
But I have to say I looked more like Carol Burnett when she portrayed Norma Desmond in a comedy spoof.
I think I scared the poop outta Poor Shankie.
OH MY GOODNESS.
It has come to my attention recently that I might possibly want to consider wearing some makeup. Now I have not worn any makeup since... well..... ever. And I am 52. I mean I think I wore some in High School...but was called "Bozo" way too often, so I don't think I wore it long. I obviously didn't know how or the other kids in my school were absolutely horrendous. Which now that I remember, I think they were as I was chased by several girls each day I went simply because I wore a Bra to school. (mom always said you should wear a bra to school)
Geez, I don't know why I'm not in some kind of therapy. :(
I didn't have anyone to "show" me how to wear makeup, except for when I went to Bible College in Florida and a few times they had a lady come in to demonstrate the correct way to wear makeup. It was shortly after that when I burnt my face and the doctor told me it was better not to wear any makeup especially foundation or any type of liquid and if I wore any I should use Cover Girl only. So that's all I use.
Then I remember asking my dad for some kind of allowance to go buy some makeup to wear, as I saw him dish out cash constantly for my older sister who wore makeup like it was going out of style and didn't use the cheap stuff either, she shopped for her makeup at a place called Merle Norman's..and back then it was one of the more expensive places to purchase makeup products.
But back to ME.....
when I asked dad for some money for myself, he said no I didn't need any, I was naturally pretty and didn't need makeup like my sister. Well it hurt some not to get any money, but then of course I got a thick head for a while and was sure my sister had to look like Cruella DeVil without makeup. But then got older and realized how cheap my dad can be and what he was really doing was saving money by not having to give me any for makeup. Because I remember having the same conversation with him over buying school clothes. He told me I could go to Kresge's, as their clothes were exactly the same as the higher priced stores, it just made a difference to how you took care of them all the while giving my sister an open charge account to Paul Harris.
Man, I really cannot believe I am not in therapy.
Ok that took way too much outta me.
Anyhow, as I said since it came to my attention that I needed to consider wearing makeup, I just have not got it out of my mind. (Some people are just mean) So I decided to go try something different. The only thing I do is a bit of blush. So, First off I got some lipstick/gloss or whatever it's called. I saw a commercial and decided it was for me as it was to make your lips plumper and shiny, and my 13 year old niece wears it why shouldn't I, besides I had a coupon.
Holy Crap, how does anybody actually wear this stuff? I mean I didn't just try it once I tried it twice. And the second time I could not wipe it off my lips fast enough...it stung the crap outta my lips. I used creams, Vaseline, soap and water but nothing helped for what seemed like an hour. I had to sit with my lips down in a glass full of ice and Mountain Dew for about 20 minutes. It wore me out.
Ok a few weeks went by and I thought I was over it, then I got another coupon and bright idea. I got some mascara. I tried it one day while I was home alone, it didn't take too long til I took it off, about 5 seconds as soon as I could pry my eyes open. My eyes felt like I had mud on them. I decided to give it another try and I could only think of one thing to say after seeing myself, so I went to Shankie and placed my hand over my forehead and said...
"I am ready for my closeup Mr. DeMille!!"
You know from the movie Sunset Boulevard with Gloria Swanson as Norma Desmond?
But I have to say I looked more like Carol Burnett when she portrayed Norma Desmond in a comedy spoof.
I think I scared the poop outta Poor Shankie.
posted by dona at 2/28/2008
2 Comments:
Makeup??? We are supposed to wear makeup???? : ) Sorry to hear Shank is having problems. I hope things turn out well.
Okay...that lip plumper stuff is plain weird! Makes your lips feel really funny. And I think "you are beautiful...no matter what they say"....(in my best Christina voice! LOL)
I miss you!
Post a Comment
<< Home